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Don’t wait 8 years to tell your truth

Yesterday I was reading this relationship story on Reddit…

 

“My spouse and I have been together for 8 years. 

 

Our sex life has had lots of ups and downs. 

 

Sometimes it felt like it was fire and was really good. 

But there were long stretches where I felt like I was starving. 

 

While they never denied me when I initiated… but the lack of initiation on their part has destroyed my self-esteem and has left me so incredibly unfulfilled. 

 

I have so missed the feeling of being desired and having my partner seduce me.

 

Recently my spouse came out to me as asexual.

 

It was really hard for my spouse to come out. They were so nervous and scared. I hugged them and thanked them for telling me. 

 

I told them everything will be alright.

 

But it won’t be. 

 

I’m so worried about my spouse. 

 

They are really dependent on me socially, emotionally, and financially. And I know that they love me. They love me more than anyone ever has in my entire life.

 

I wish love could be enough for me to be happy in a relationship.

 

But it isn’t.

 

I can’t go the rest of my life with a partner who isn’t sexually attracted to me. 

 

So I spoke with a lawyer.

 

Tomorrow I’m handing them divorce papers. It is really going to suck!”

 

Breaking up… divorce… letting someone go… 

 

Suck. 

 

No doubt about that.

 

But you can’t keep destroying your self-esteem for the rest of your life.

 

I respect this person’s decision. 

 

And I respect their compassion towards their spouse.

 

Because if I had been in this situation… it would have been hard for me to keep calm.

 

It took someone 8 years in a marriage to come out with this truth?!!

 

“Maybe they lied because they didn’t understand their sexuality”

 

Cool. 

 

They could have shared they are feeling li’l or no attraction to their partner.

 

Then they could have worked together.

 

And figured things out in like 2 years instead of 8.

 

But they chose not to.

 

Easy for me to pass judgment from afar.

 

There might be more to this story that we don’t know.

 

But what does all of this have to do with coaching biz?

 

Boundaries – what comes in and what stays out. 

COURAGE – to speak your truth.

 

Define who are the right clients for you.

And who are not.

 

Know what you’re going to tolerate.

And what you’re going to say NO to.

 

And then if someone isn’t the right client for you… have the COURAGE to let ‘em go.

 

Don’t keep them just because you need the money.

 

If you’re finding it harder to do…

 

Your problem isn’t that you will have to let go of 1 client.

 

Your problem is you aren’t getting enough of the right clients consistently… that you can easily say NO to not-so-right clients.

 

Work on solving that problem.

 

Instead of faking up and trying hard to keep the client that isn’t right for you.

 

It’s not good for you in the long run. And it isn’t good for them.

 

That’s it for today. 

 

Lead this week with CLARITY & COURAGE.

 

P.S. Whenever you’re ready, there’s 1 way I can help you:

 

Meaningful Momentum Program

 

It’s right for coaches who… 

 

Are courageous and have big plans for this year…

 

Want to build a scalable and long-lasting biz that’s in alignment with who they are… 

 

Want to add 10k – 50k profits every month while having the time of their lives.

 

If that interests you, just book a short call with me below.

 

Take care.

 

Signing off…

NP

Would you like to discover how coaches hit (consistent) 5 figure months?

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© Copyright Chevaun 2024. All Rights Reserved. T&C. Privacy. Refunds.
Follow us around the web: LinkedIn . Facebook . Instagram